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Those who have been following the (mis) adventures of Wee Hob know he's had his ups and downs of late. Today marked a turning point for him. He went back to school after spring break, and as we'd worked out and agreed with his therapist, he got a Clean Slate-- still some reasonable restrictions for a 12 year old, but all his privileges back. Mom trusts him again (well, trust, but Verify, I say. To myself.) He knows he needs to not blow it again here.

One of his lost privileges was Boy Scouts. So, with 2 weeks to their annual fundraiser dinner (anybody want to donate canned goods? Buy a ticket? It's a great deal. Except, you know, for the transatlantic flight some of you would have to book to get here.....) we're back at the meeting tonight. Which meant-- Scoutmaster Conference, at which Wee Hob had to be a man and own up to what he'd done and see if Scoutmaster would have him back in the troop.

In the interim between the original grounding and now, the troop changed Scoutmasters, and the jovial but somewhat ineffectual scoutmaster was replaced by a gruff, good ol' boy drill sergeant of a man. So I pulled Mr. W aside, and our advancement chair Ms. P, who is a lifelong scouter and also has been a district commissioner for years. She's a lovely older woman who is much beloved by all the boys-- tough, but kind and fair.

I told them briefly, Wee Hob was grounded for serious misbehavior, and gave them a background of the meds issue, which some of you identified even back in the fall as being a problem. That seems to have worked itself out in this latest meds change-- Concerta rocks. I said clearly in front of him (as his therapist and I have said to him in private) that the meds issue may explain some of this, but it in no way excuses it. So, having said my very short piece, I left him to his fate.

Later I talked with Ms. P and from Mr. W about what he said, and they both told me they were impressed with his courage in owning up to his faults. He was sincerely contrite, almost in tears, and he told me on the way home that he knew now he never wanted to make either of them ashamed of him again with his behavior. And he got some good advice and things to think about. Both are completely supportive of his staying with the troop and will be pulling for him, for us. And he was very happy to see all his buddies again.

So I am proud of my small Boy Scout, who did a hard thing tonight and a little bit of growing up. And I am grateful to the people around me, in my real and virtual worlds, who support us, give good advice and hugs, and generally are there when I'm sure I'm completely blowing this whole parenting gig. Thanks, you guys.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 02:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladyforash.livejournal.com
It's really great that Wee Hob is surrounded by such good folks!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
Thanks, Lady. I'm happy you're one of them. In a long distance, virtual sort of way.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 03:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firefly124.livejournal.com
I'm so glad he owned up to his responsibility for his actions and that he'll be staying with the troop. I hope that it will be a positive reinforcer for him to keep doing well. {{hugs}}

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
Thanks. I'm glad about it too.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 03:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] angelmischa.livejournal.com
Aww, good ol' Wee Hob. Tough thing to do, and he handled it really well by the sounds. :-D *warm and fuzzy now*

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
When we talked about the boy Scout Law and I asked him to put them in order by how well he doea at each one/ how much he thinks the word describes him, "Brave" was at the top of his list. I think he's right on that.

Clean was at the bottom, which is, sadly, also correct.....

Thanks, new friend. You'll be reading a lot of Wee Hob's exploits now. I'm hoping he'll start being really boring for a while, though.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 03:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] empresspatti.livejournal.com
Quite the life moment - you son turning into an adult - the kind of adult you'd like - right before your eyes.

We might cheer from the sidelines - but you are doing the dirty work in the trenches. Good job Mom!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
Quite the life moment, indeed. Thanks, Lady. I know you're just in a different trench. But I'm glad to know you're out there.
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(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
Thanks. Hugs to you, too, in your Mom struggles. Goes both ways, you know.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 06:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] headrush100.livejournal.com
Brilliant news that Wee Hob did the right - and difficult - thing, and that he was in turn given the chance to remain in the company of the good people there. *big hugs*

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
yes indeed. Thanks, and hugs back.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 06:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ex-shitsu-to509.livejournal.com
Oh that's great news. Am so pleased that things are looking up for you and Wee Hob.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:25 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-08 07:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sunsethill.livejournal.com
My daughter had to do something like this, only she was much older. It is SO hard to face people and confess to a wrong, but then it is so freeing, because you're not sitting around wondering when everyone is going to find out. I'm sure your son will find this to be true, also.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 12:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
I think he is finding it. It's actually significant he could find the words, because at first, even caught dead to rights, he couldn't articulate what he did at all.

I'm very proud of him. Now comes the even harder work of making your actions match your apology. So far, so good.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 06:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snarkysneak.livejournal.com
Good man! You should be proud of him.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-09 08:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
Indeed I am.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-10 05:09 am (UTC)
ext_1124: (Default)
From: [identity profile] rainkatt.livejournal.com
Oh, that's a delight. And bless him for his courage!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-04-10 01:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hobgoblinn.livejournal.com
Indeed yes. Thanks.
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