In which hobgoblinn contemplates excommunication...

[hobgoblinn]

and wonders if this is a Bad Thing.

Got a call from the Head Usher/ director of the Cathedral Foundation today. I'll call him Barry. He said during his meeting with the rector of our church, that the good Msgr. was very upset by the behavior of Wee Hobgoblinn during services. While I am singing, he is wandering around exploring, particularly at masses later in the weekend after he's already attended one or more.

The Msgr's solution to this problem? Talk to me before or after one of the myriad services I sing there every week? Call me directly and express concern for the boy's spiritual welfare? No. Tell Barry to call me tonight and decree that Wee Hob "Can only be in Church if he is supervised by a Family Member." His godfather does not count. Neither, therefore, do the many extended family members available through my membership in the choir and Anawim.

Do you know how many "Family Members" this boy has? One. Me. And he is only allowed in Church if I am sitting right next to him, and he is in the pew.

I haven't asked the obvious question yet-- "Or what?" but rest assured, I intend to, at my earliest opportunity.

Neither I nor Wee Hob's godfather, who called and got another version of this discussion from poor Barry, know quite what to make of this. Some months back, Wee Hob asked to train to be a server, which would give him something to do during masses and let him be helpful, which would certainly solve the boredom problem. At the time, this same Msgr. said no without giving any reason, even after Barry had made arrangements with me to bring him in on a Saturday afternoon to start the training. At the time, I figured he just didn't know Wee Hob well yet, and he wasn't making a good impression as a "serious, religious lad" (he's 12, remember) and I didn't make an issue of it.

Should he be wandering around in the back during services? No. I get that. In fact, the incident that seems to have precipitated all this happened Christmas morning, when I thought he was working as an usher. Some seminarian's cell phone came up missing and someone remembered seeing him wandering. He has his own cell phone, and I really doubt he went through people's stuff hanging back there. But wrong place, wrong time, I suppose. And they don't have the balls to accuse him of theft to his face, much less mine, so this is how they handle it instead.

I keep reminding myself how stunningly well the Institutional Church has been handling so many other things of late. And this particular representative of the fraternity is more troubled than most, locking the church gates from the garden to the main parking lot while CCD is still going on, just to keep the "homeless" people out of his backyard. Which means everyone has to walk clear around the block in this terribly dangerous neighborhood to get to their cars after CCD is over. Of course, the Church itself stays locked when services are not going on.

Sorry, had to vent. On the upside, I have to take Wee Hob to his godfather's Sunday afternoon for him to be there Monday, as I have to sing the Vigil masses both days and he's apparently Not Welcome. Which means I get to see Sweeney Todd Sunday night after mass, while Wee Hob has an elsewhere to be. And his godfather spent a long while over here today helping him organize his room and talking to him about life.

Still, if I could pull it off, I would love to emulate my icon and bitch slap an Ordained One. Seriously.

Am I going to hell, do you think?

Comments

[sahiya.livejournal.com]

My experience is that priests have little or no hands-on experience with kids of any age. I've known a couple that were naturals (the ones that people referred to as Father What-a-Waste), but 90% of them do not understand kids at all (including some of those teaching in Catholic schools, oy). This priest sounds like he is clueless and insensitive when it comes to wee ones in general and Wee Hob in particular; if I were you, I'd try to find a compromise that allows him to attend one service a week with his godfather (perhaps if you point out that you won't be able to sing in the choir otherwise) and try to find alternate activities for him during the other times you have to be at Mass to sing. If I'd had to attend more than one Mass a week as a kid, there would have been some serious rebellion on the horizon.

Alternatively, I'd go with what everyone else is saying and find another church, since the last few lines of your entry make me think this is part of a trend. Another place might let him train as a server as well.